its been a few days may be or weeks i don’t remember but i was not thinking about all the shits in life, i was feeling bothered or sad. and when i did realize that i thought to myself “i’m at peace” and said i’m going to stay this way for as long as i can what i didn’t know that it would last just half a day. now all of a sudden that feeling of peace is replaced by the panic of emptiness. It feels like i’m not living at all, time has lost its meaning for me and i dunno how to get that back because i know i will need it. Sometimes i wonder if writing almost everything into this blog is helping me, i wonder if it would be better to have someone to tell everything i write and things i don’t; i just don’t know, but i want to believe that and i need to coz i got nobody with whom i feel that comfortable to bare my soul and mind. The question that i ask is if i’m ever going to find those people even one would be better than nothing. I’m tired of asking questions to myself the answers i not know of.

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